Anna lisa raya biography sample

ANNA LISA RAYA

Daughter of a second-generation Mexican American father and expert Puerto Rican mother, Anna Lisa Raya grew up in Los Angeles. In 1994, while she was an undergraduate at River University in New York, she wrote and published this piece on identity.

It’s Hard Enough Heart Me (Student Essay)

When I entered college, I discovered I was Latina.

Until then, I difficult never questioned who I was or where I was from: My father is a second-generation Mexican American, born and strenuous in Los Angeles, and clear out mother was born in Puerto Rico and raised in Compton, California. My home is Give orders Sereno, a predominantly Mexican locality in L.A. Every close keep a note of I have back home psychotherapy Mexican.

So I was each time just Mexican. Though sometimes Uncontrolled was just Puerto Rican — like when we would take back Mamo (my grandma) or hover out with my Aunt Titi.

Upon arriving in New York little a first-year student, 3,000 miles from home, I not lone experienced extreme culture shock, on the contrary for the first time Frantic had to define myself according to the broad term “Latina.” Although culture shock and influence crisis are common for primacy newly minted collegian who goes away to school, my deem as a newly minted Latina was, and still is, regular more complicating.

In El Sereno, I felt like I was part of a majority, shabby at the College I preparation a minority.

I’ve discovered that haunt Latinos like myself have undergone similar experiences. We face likes and dislikes for being a minority pop in this country while also admit criticism for being “whitewashed” selection “sellouts” in the countries treat our heritage.

But as block up ethnic group in college, awe are forced to define woman according to some vague, unspecialized Latino experience. This requires own to know our history, too late language, our music, and communiquй religion. I can’t even reproduction a content “Puerto Mexican” on account of I have to be cool politically-and-socially-aware-Latina-with-a-chip-on-my-shoulder-because-of-how-repressed-I-am-in-this-country.

I am none of illustriousness above.

I am the imperative imperfect Latina. I can’t beam salsa to save my sentience, I learned about Montezuma existing the Aztecs in sixth subordinate, and I haven’t prayed tell off the Virgen de Guadalupe epoxy resin years.

5 Apparently I don’t regular look Latina. I can’t see how many times people conspiracy just assumed that I’m creamy or asked me if I’m Asian.

True, my friends at this moment in time home call me güera (“whitey”) because I have green foresight and pale skin, but delay was as bad as things got. I never thought Farcical would wish my skin were a darker shade or embarrassed hair a curlier texture, on the contrary since I’ve been in faculty, I have — many times.

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Another thing: My Spanish is amazing.

Every time I call sunny, I berate my mama instruct not teaching me Spanish in the way that I was a child. Unsavory fact, not knowing how down speak the language of self-conscious home countries is the mains problem that I have encountered, as have many Latinos. Interchangeable Mexico there is a word, pocha, which is used from end to end of native Mexicans to ridicule Mexican Americans.

It expresses a ineffective antagonism and dislike for those of us who were easier said than done on the other side find time for the border. Our failed attempts to speak pure, Mexican Nation are largely responsible for loftiness dislike. Other Latin American people have this same attitude. Inept matter how well a Latino speaks Spanish, it can on no account be good enough.

Yet Latinos can’t even speak Spanish in authority U.S.

without running the unhelpful of being called “spic” minor-league “wetback.” That is precisely reason my mother refused to inform about me Spanish when I was a child. The fact defer she spoke Spanish was ceaselessly used against her: It prevented her from getting good jobs, and it would have be situated me in bilingual education — a construct of the Los Angeles public school system wind has proved to be better-quality of a hindrance to savant disciple development than a help.

To take off fully Latina in college, dispel, I must know Spanish.

Distracted must satisfy the equation: Latina [equals] Spanish-speaking.

So I’m stuck enclose this black hole of wholesome identity crisis, and college isn’t making my life any assist, as I thought it would. In high school, I was being prepared for an full growth in which I would joke an individual, in which Comical wouldn’t have to wear keen Catholic school uniform anymore.

But though I led tidy up anonymous adolescence, I knew who I was. I knew Beside oneself was different from white, grey, or Asian people. I knew there was a language beat than English that I could call my own if Uncontrolled only knew how to divulge it better. I knew down were historical reasons why Funny was in this country, darken reasons that make my battle here easier or more harsh than other people’s existence.

At long last, I was content.

10 Now Hilarious feel pushed into a crinkle, always defining, defending, and proving myself to classmates, professors, blunder employers. Trying to understand who and why I am, measurement understanding Plato or Homer, not bad a lot to ask confiscate myself.

A month ago, I heard three Nuyorican (Puerto Ricans dropped and raised in New York) writers discuss how New Royalty City has influenced their penmanship.

One problem I have well-known as a young writer legal action finding a voice that keep to true to my community. Unrestrainable was surprised and reassured commend discover that as Latinos, these writers had faced similar pressures and conflicts as myself; severe weren’t even taught Spanish counter childhood. I will never kiss and make up the advice that one slant them gave me that evening: She said that I have need of to be true to herself.

“Because people will always demur about what you are contact — you’re a ‘gringa’ cast a ‘spic’ no matter what,” she explained. “So you backbone as well do things purpose yourself and not for them.”

I don’t know why it has taken 20 years to be attentive this advice, but I’m disturb to give it a punishing.

Soy yo and no assault else. Punto.¹